


Higher Education

by moonriver_andM



Category: Golden Girls
Genre: Gen, based on somewhat real life events, more like, okay maybe not events, things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-14
Updated: 2017-07-14
Packaged: 2018-12-01 22:51:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 284
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11496411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonriver_andM/pseuds/moonriver_andM
Summary: I did that once!





	Higher Education

**Author's Note:**

> The girls find themselves at a university open house during one of their college-hunting trips for Blanche’s grandson.

‘Shhhhh... don’t say  _that_  out loud!’

Dorothy snaps: ‘What Blanche? I was asking the woman where to find the john. What else could I do? Act it out?’

‘No, Dorothy...  _grand_ son _._ You said we were college-hunting for my  _grandson._ We couldn’t let them know I’m a grandmother! They wouldn’t believe that seeing such a youthful beauty as  _I_  am.’

‘Yes, Blanche. And Rose’s hair colour is natural.’ Sophia chimes in.

‘Thank you Sophia. I think it’s the genes, and the lifestyle too. My mother always said: ‘You are the words you say, and never let anyone know how many sheep you can castrate in an hour. They’ll want to know your trade secrets. Anyway, this is why my hair is like rays of sunshine, it’s because I talk about positive things all the time!’

‘Oops. I shouldn’t have let Dorothy take that summer job door-to-door selling broomsticks.’

‘Ma!’

‘Shhh... the Professor is coming! He reminds me of Gene Davenport, the neurosurgeon from two weeks ago? He bought me a new nurse outfit because he accidentally ripped the older one during... well, never mind. Look at the fancy slideshows!’

 

  


 

‘Oh look, that’s a good option! Sure-fire way to get things goin’ ’

‘Blanche, he’s talking about a strategy for buying and selling financial instruments.’

‘This reminds me of that time when Jolly - our one-eyed cow who kept trying to --’

‘Can you guys be quiet? I’m trying to pay attention to the professor here! Why can’t the man stop moving his left hand back and forth! I want to see if he’s wearing a wedding ring for Dorothy.’

‘Ma!’

 

  


 

A shrill exclamation arises:

‘Oooooh... I did  _that_ once!’

Necks turn.

Eyes stare.

Mouths gape.

Silence: ensues.

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by my suppressed giggling fit in a finance class upon seeing the above slides. Sometimes I'd like to think I'm mature, but who am I kidding? 
> 
> Thank you for reading. <3


End file.
